She Didn't Care

My sister didn't care about many things. She didn't want to listen to her older sister when she was told that she wasn't allowed to eat things. She didn't care that she was stealing her older sister's stuff, like her makeup. What would you expect? She was allowed to get away with things while her older sister got blamed for everything. I would get yelled at for her constantly getting into trouble. "You're supposed to set an example."

Well, I sort of did, in a way. My siblings went on to have great lives, because they didn't want to fall into the trap that I did. What not to do, so to speak. Sadly, while they're having a grand old time with their lives, I struggle. I never really lived on my own. I was always under someone's thumb. I could have a chance now, considering the Hubbeast would allow me to try and better my life. But I'm at the point, I just can't. Too many things have caused me to be afraid to want better. I am just fine living a simple life, even though I hate my job; yes, as much as I like who I work for, there are days that I do hate my job. I missed out on so much, and now that I could try to get a degree, I have that fear that I won't be good at anything.

I'm better at writing blog entries, because I just write what I feel without having to work too hard at it. I used to be able to write poetry. I thought I was pretty good. If I could only find that dumb thumb drive, I might be able to publish it on the site. Yes, I'm ranting a bit. Okay, a lot. I don't know what else to do with my lack of experience in things. I'm trying to learn new things, and I'm trying to get back into the hobbies that used to give me joy. Wish me luck, and much love dearies.